noisemonkey

Manufacturing Music News Since 2002
NEWS: Groove Is In The Heart, Surgeons ‘Baffled’ The world of medical science was rocked like a fat rock star on a rocking horse today by the discovery of a groove gland in the heart. Pioneering surgeons at St Optimus School Of Medical Medicine made the discovery and presented the scientific world with their results on Tuesday, by drawing the location of the gland onto the front of an old Valentines card. The groove glands were found cheekily hiding behind the upper aortic cardio-doohickey. They are believed to have been previously missed by all other surgeons due to it being kind of dark and gross in there. Medical text books currently inaccurately state that groove is in the ankles. “This turns medical science on its head,” said medical science spokesman Timothy Wardrobe, “Now we’re all wearing shoes as hats - and that’s NOT a good look.”

NEWS: Groove Is In The Heart, Surgeons ‘Baffled’

The world of medical science was rocked like a fat rock star on a rocking horse today by the discovery of a groove gland in the heart.

Pioneering surgeons at St Optimus School Of Medical Medicine made the discovery and presented the scientific world with their results on Tuesday, by drawing the location of the gland onto the front of an old Valentines card.

The groove glands were found cheekily hiding behind the upper aortic cardio-doohickey. They are believed to have been previously missed by all other surgeons due to it being kind of dark and gross in there. Medical text books currently inaccurately state that groove is in the ankles.

“This turns medical science on its head,” said medical science spokesman Timothy Wardrobe, “Now we’re all wearing shoes as hats - and that’s NOT a good look.”

NEWS: Toy Shop Sales Non-Stop For Top Toy This Christmas, As Tickle-Me-Elbow Sells Out Sales of UK group Elbow’s tie-in product ‘Tickle-Me-Elbow’ have beaten all expectations in the run-up to Christmas, leading to shortages and the fear that the run-up may not have been long enough to jump over Christmas itself. The popular toy features the big-bearded head and jovial features of Elbow frontman Guy Garvey, and the soft, furry, huggable body of Elbow frontman Guy Garvey. When squeezed, the toy emits a warm chuckle. When squeezed twice, the toy bursts into a anthemic, yet poignant song. When squeezed three times, the toy has to sit down and catch its breath for a couple of minutes. It has proven to be a massive hit with children everywhere - topping an annual survey of some of the nation’s largest sellers of toys - including Toys ‘R’ Us [sic], ToyMaster, ToyLord, ToyOverlord, and Ann Summers. “With Elbow winning the Mercury Music Prize in September 2008, there’s never been a better time to build on their creative success with this tie-in product,” said Elbow spokesman Timothy Wardrobe, “This story couldn’t be more topical right now.” Tickle-Me-Elbow is not the only music tie-in product released this Christmas. Also out is a toy version of James Blunt. Children feed him play-dough, press down his head, and he releases hits out the other end. Blunt has failed to reach the top spot, and remains number two.

NEWS: Toy Shop Sales Non-Stop For Top Toy This Christmas, As Tickle-Me-Elbow Sells Out

Sales of UK group Elbow’s tie-in product ‘Tickle-Me-Elbow’ have beaten all expectations in the run-up to Christmas, leading to shortages and the fear that the run-up may not have been long enough to jump over Christmas itself.

The popular toy features the big-bearded head and jovial features of Elbow frontman Guy Garvey, and the soft, furry, huggable body of Elbow frontman Guy Garvey. When squeezed, the toy emits a warm chuckle. When squeezed twice, the toy bursts into a anthemic, yet poignant song. When squeezed three times, the toy has to sit down and catch its breath for a couple of minutes.

It has proven to be a massive hit with children everywhere - topping an annual survey of some of the nation’s largest sellers of toys - including Toys ‘R’ Us [sic], ToyMaster, ToyLord, ToyOverlord, and Ann Summers.

“With Elbow winning the Mercury Music Prize in September 2008, there’s never been a better time to build on their creative success with this tie-in product,” said Elbow spokesman Timothy Wardrobe, “This story couldn’t be more topical right now.”

Tickle-Me-Elbow is not the only music tie-in product released this Christmas. Also out is a toy version of James Blunt. Children feed him play-dough, press down his head, and he releases hits out the other end. Blunt has failed to reach the top spot, and remains number two.